A father walks by his son’s room. He notices, with his parental instincts,
that something must be wrong. The room is spotless and even the bed is made.
Several alarms go off at once, especially when he sees a letter on the pillow
with the word “Dad” written on the envelope. Expecting the worst, he opens the
letter and begins reading it with trembling hands.
"Dear Dad,
It is with great regret
and sorrow that I am writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because
I wanted to avoid a scene with mom and you. I've been finding real passion with
Stacy, and she is so nice, but I knew you would not approve because of her
piercings, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes, and the fact she's much older
than I am.
But it's not only the
passion Dad; she's pregnant.
Stacy said that we will
be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods, and has a stack of firewood for
the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.
Stacy has opened my eyes
to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for
ourselves and trading it with other people in the commune -- for all the
cocaine and ecstasy we want.
In the meantime, we'll
pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so that Stacy can get better. She
sure deserves it!
Don’t worry, Dad. I’m 15,
and I know how to take care of myself. Someday, I’m sure we’ll be back to
visit, so you can get to know your many grandchildren.
Love,
Joshua
P.S. Dad, none of the
above is true. I’m over at Jason’s house. I just wanted to remind you that
there are worse things in life than the school report that’s on the kitchen
table. Call when it’s safe for me to come home!"
This son is clearly a veteran in breaking bad news to his parents.
Share this teenager’s wicked idea. His parents are surely grateful for his
bad grades for the first time ever….